Angel in My Pocket

Angel in My Pocket

I am a tiny angel; I am smaller than your thumb.

I live in people’s pockets, that’s where I have my fun.

I don’t suppose you can see me, I am too tiny to detect.

Though I am with you all the time, I doubt we have ever met.

Before I was an angel, I was a fairy in a flower.

God himself hand-picked me and gave me angel power.

Now God has many angels that he trains in angel pools.

We become his eyes, ears and hands; we become his special tools.

And because God is so busy with way too much to do,

He said that my assignment is to keep close watch on you.

When he tucked me in your pocket, he blessed you with angel care.

Then told me to never leave you and vowed always to be there.

The above is part of a gift I received recently, from my husband’s aunt and uncle, after we experienced the loss of our third baby in less than a year. Many of you reading are most likely not familiar with my story, and for those of you who are, I want to thank you from the bottom of my heart for your kind words, thoughts, and prayers.

This blog, while part of my healing process, is also about familiarizing people with our story and hopefully helping other women who have dealt with multiple losses. I suppose, in order for my readers to understand how we got here, I should start at the beginning. Please bear with me, as this is our almost nine-year story in a nutshell:

Mike and I had known each other for years before we started dating. He is younger than I and was a distant friend of my brothers. We began dating in 2003 when I was a senior and Mike a sophomore in high school. We had this instant connection: he was different from the ones I had dated before. Mike wasn’t jaded; the little things in life were important to him: family, friends, sitting outside on a warm, summer night, etc. We quickly realized we had more things in common than we thought.

Fast forward to Summer 2006: Mike was fresh off his first year in college and I was halfway through my college education. We had overcome many trials and tribulations in our short three years as a couple, and we were head over heels in love with each other. Mike proposed on July 17, 2006 and I, of course, said yes. I was almost 21; Mike 19, almost 20.

May 3, 2008: Our Wedding Day was the most magical and memorable day of my short then 22 year old life. There was absolutely no doubt in my mind that I was marrying the person that God had made for me. I simply could not wait to start building a life with the man at the end of the aisle…

The summer immediately following our wedding was spent as most newlywed couples do: moving into our new home, remodeling, and working out the kinks that come with never having lived together. We were blissfully happy.

One beautiful September day, I realized there was something missing from my everyday routine, normal life: my period. I took a pregnancy test in the middle of the day that revealed that I was indeed carrying our first child.

Now, let me digress for a minute to tell you about the sheer shock that set in: I was diagnosed at an early age with ovarian cysts and basically told that I had a very small chance of conceiving and successfully carrying children of my own. Mike and I had discussed this several times and considered all alternative options, just in case. I wanted him to know what he was getting into before he got into it.

So, let’s just say on that September day, I was in shock. The amount of emotions that surged through my body when that second pink line appeared can’t even be described in words. However, there was this part of me that was utterly excited about the thought of being a mother. Keep in mind that this was September 2008, just four months after we were married.

My pregnancy, to put it frankly, was a dream pregnancy. I experienced absolutely zero complications and delivered a very healthy and incredibly beautiful 8lb 15.7oz baby girl on May 13, 2009 at 8:48 P.M., just one year and ten days after we were married. Mike and I were over the moon with Harper Faith and immediately decided that we wanted more children in due time. We spent the better part of her first year and a half telling anyone who would listen about how in love we were with this wonderful gift from God. And we considered her just that: our miracle, our gift from God, the child HE chose for us.

I think it’s best to leave it at that: stay tuned for my next post! And, of course, thank you for reading!